Process Update: August 2019

The future of the Physical.

Lately in relation to my personal process, where I am right now, I feel as though I’m standing in the living space of the house that is the body of me, that I’ve been renovating by gutting the interior, strengthening the foundation, replacing the walls, painting and so on to the point that I think this particular room, as my main living space is nearing completion. The thing is, as with all of the work of self-change that I’ve completed, this particular room is now littered with little bits and pieces of leftover stuff  that I missed or didn’t bother with while I was focused on what I considered to be the bigger stuff. Nevertheless, it still has to be done because, after all it is the in the small that we create the big.

In order to accomplish this, I plan to go through the self-forgiveness and self-corrective statements that I’ve written over the last 6 months or so in relation to this part of my process. Specifically, I will sound out or speak aloud what I have written, rewrite various self-forgiveness and self- corrective statements as required to specify my intentions and then perhaps even sound it out once more in order to really place this information physically into and as myself by physically “hearing it,” from which I will then continue to push myself to live the words I’ve written to in essence become the living word by substantiating my redefined, non-polarized (sound definitions) of such words into and as the living substance of my physical body. And that’s essentially my plan in relation to this part of my personal process. Really very cool stuff.

Moving on to the day to day kind of stuff, I’ll be heading back to work in about two weeks to begin a new semester, my sixth year at Asia University in Wufeng, Taichung, near the center of Taiwan. This is another record for me because, before I started teaching there, except for the school that my partner and I owned for about eight years, I don’t think that I ever worked at any place for much more than a year.

For sure I like teaching at this university; it’s centrally located, easy to navigate and filled with a lot of friendly people. However, the reason that I’m still working there has less to do with the university itself than it does with my personal process of self-change. In short, whereas in the past, I felt that I had to force myself to keep moving so as to never let myself become weak or dependent on where I was, nowadays in pushing myself (increasingly so) to constantly and continuously change myself for the better, I’ve established myself as my foundation of self-trust from within and as which I understand that I am able to direct myself in all ways wherever I am. Which is to say that I will face, manage and/or deal with all obstacles in my path as I require.

That being said, I am excited (in a stable way) about returning to my routine of teaching/fun and I am thankful for this opportunity to walk my process of self-change with the support of so many of the Desteni group that are working so diligently, essentially utilizing this life to make it count and eventually have this process available to everybody.

The Simplicity of Redefining & Living Words

On the subject of redefining words, I had had some difficulties because I attempted to make it too complex. In other words, I thought that I had to have a special/unique word for every moment of my day to precisely determine and define how I cared to express myself constantly and continuously.

Then, a few nights ago while walking in the park with my partner, I noticed that I was becoming irritated. At first, in beginning of that moment (of realization) I had already started to project or blame my irritation onto my partner for speaking. However, in that same moment, before the projection even reached her, I stopped it and brought it back to myself. It only took an instant for me to look into me (at the energetic point that I had defined as irritation) to see that the point  was actually of fatigue - having driven 7 hours that day - that had triggered the definition of irritation within and as me. Thus, all still in the same moment, it occurred to me to simply choose a different word, one that I would prefer to embody and live.

Whereas in the past, I might have spent time searching the perfect word and ended up missing the opportunity to actually change myself in that same moment; this time, I simply chose the the first correction that came up and it wasn’t just a word, it was a sentence, “walking in the park and conversing.” Still in that same moment, having simply said the words “walking in the park and conversing” and seen the sentence in my mind, I decided and committed myself to live those words and I did just that.  

From an experience of irritation wherein I as my mind had been looking to project blame onto my partner,  I instead made the decision, who I would be in that moment, by choosing and stating the word (or words) to become and live. The key point that I realized in all of this (which I had been missing) was the simplicity of redefining and living words. In other words, I now see that it’s not necessary to complicate things with fancy words. Walking in the park and conversing is just that, walking in the park and conversing. Lol, I used to think that, in redefining words, I had to choose words such as joyful or jolly expression even though it was just a judgment of how I believed I should be and not necessarily how I really cared to be or even how I self-honestly saw myself as being.

In short, by determining or choosing the words that I cared to live, stating them and trusting myself to stand as and live wholly the words that I stated, I also released myself of the energetic definition of irritation. How? Because in wholly committing to embrace and live the words, “walking in the part and conversing,” I also wholly redefined who I was and how I would be in that moment, therein leaving no room of for the energetic definition/experience of irritation. In this simplest of moments, I realized that I am in thought, in word and in deed able to change who I am in a moment.

Although these days I sometimes take for granted being able to see my thoughts as they move, almost like me as the being, stopping time inside of me to look into me and see how things are moving in the mind consciousness system of my physical body, I am also quite aware of the process that I have been walking with Desteni.  For more on simply redefining words, have a look at the Facebook pages, Self and Living or School of Ultimate Living.