Continuing with the Word, Criticism

A while back I wrote about feeling as though I were being criticized for not doing enough. Specifically, I noticed that I had reacted to the point of criticism as though it were a personal attack against me or a threat to my survival. I’m still working on this point, exposing the design of the energies that have lead up to me becoming defensive when it comes to criticism. When I look back at this point of feeling threatened or attacked when facing points such as criticism, I’m able to bring up memories going back to adolescence years. However, the further back I attempt to look, more the lines between my memory of what really happened and my imagination of it begin to blur.

What’s the difference between my memory and my imagination? Perceptions and how they’re defined; six in one hand, half a dozen in the other, as my younger brother used to say. That might be a fun point to analyze, but in the end - as I see it, my memories have been tainted with energetic definitions or polarized words that have ended up defining how I became. This has been and still is the problem. So I guess the solution to changing who I am now is to locate all of the polarized definitions of words and redefine them into non-polarized definitions or living words.

In getting back to the point of criticism, it’s a point that I had  linked with the word, survival and energetically defined as threatening. Which means that in the past, whenever this word came up, I would end up feeling as though I were being threatened, as though someone were attacking me. In working with this point, opening it up and watching for it, I recently noticed myself thinking about someone exactly the way I had imagined someone was thinking about me. This confirmed to me the mirror effect of judgments projected onto others, i.e., that our judgments (of what we perceive to be of others) are actually our own self-judgments reflecting back to us through others as the mirrors of ourselves. All eyes are but mirrors of ourselves, meaning that I am of everyone else, as is everyone of everyone else the same as me, but in different locations or awarenesses that each one of us define as unique.

Equality and oneness is easy to imagine, but not so easy to understand or live, especially when attempting to do so while peering through the many frequencies by which we’ve each defined ourselves uniquely.  Therefore, what I require to do is redefine all of my polarized (energetic) definitions of words to words that I’m able to live in ways that are best for all. Here I’m reminded of the saying, don’t think of it as having to cross that gigantic mountain, but as requiring merely that I take the next step.