I don’t recall ever viewing our existence as anything other than what we’ve created. Off hand, I would say that the only really big mistake that we made (in the beginning) was to focus on energy instead of the substance of life. However, even in this respect, I guess there were contingency plans. For example, when it comes to the mind or more specifically the emergence of consciousness, I don’t view this as an outflow or occurrence that just happened. Rather, I would say that Consciousness emerged or came about more as an outflow of the design of existence (before the beginning) as a result of shall we say failsafe mechanisms put in place before we emerged into and as this existence, before we embarked on the journey or quest that we’re still currently walking.
Who would have guessed that the search for more should have been directed inwords into and as the darkness of substance rather than outwards into and as the brilliant light of energy? Quite a few I guess; however, as all aspects of life require to be investigated, explored and understood, when, where and how we explored, perhaps wasn’t viewed as important as long as certain safeguards were put into place to ensure that we eventually got back on course - as we’re now doing. Does this mean that I believe in some higher power other than what is here as everything that is here? Absolutely not. Instead, I am completely certain that each and every speck or awareness of existence together, equally as one (as the aggregate sum total of each awareness) create what is here as well as the course or direction in which we move.
I actually wrote this out yesterday without posting it because I’ve learned to be more careful to recheck my writing to see if it still makes sense to me the next day, especially after the “fun” moments of letting loose a little and writing sentences that might fall into the category of being too out there or of knowledge and information without application.
What I set out to do was place some practical information relating to trusting myself to just stop my participation in thought patterns - especially once I’ve addressed them, applied self-forgiveness and designed a corrective path. Because, after that, all that’s left to really do is to physically carry out the new instructions. However, as my mind is (as I am) so relentless in its pushing of buttons, I still sometimes get fooled for a time and end up falling back into the same mind traps.
Thankfully, as I’m understanding myself more and more thanks to the cooperation of body, being and mind/consciousness, I’m also tending to spend less and less time participating in such traps. The key I guess is to thoroughly examine such points and even without completely understanding when and how I created them, have a plan as to how I’m going to stop my participation in/as them while also overriding such programs with physical living directives to eventually fill in the space so to speak with new directives comprised of physical living programs and/or words to live.
Of the following paragraph, I’ve deleted most of what I had wrote. It had to do mainly with what I’ve learned about our existence, how over the course of existence (this existence), we had changed the ratio of substance to energy to a point beyond that which was sustainable. In other words, in exploring the substance of energy, we ended up diminishing the substance we started out with/as in the beginning of this existence, so much so that we crossed the point or law of diminishing returns (something to google). Thus, we required to reverse course (like reversing the operation that caused the consequence in the first place) to rebalance the ratio of energy to substance in order to re-substantiate our existence with substance to basically continue journeying.
Furthermore, I explained a little of my opinion (which I would prefer to call my perspective - lol) on energy. Specifically, in terms of the human situation, I think we definitely require a better understanding of how to work with substance to at least create energy that flows based on the principle or law of balance, applied based on the principle of giving and receiving. But I guess this is also going to take some time - first things first.
In the following paragraph, I expressed how cool it is to finally be together creating this existence. At least, this is how I feel - sometimes. Of course, for me so much still comes from a point of knowledge and information. However, I consider each point of view (as a description of one’s awareness) to be relevant because as I view it, the sum total of such points are and will continue to be (based on the democracy of creation) what we create as existence. Even if you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice… This is also the way I see/view not only my responsibility in relation to my personal process, but also my responsibility to write and post honestly from where I am right now - even if I am still kind of like in a box.
On a another note, which actually ties into everything I have to say and have been saying, as I was writing the word, “mathematics” (in a paragraph that I deleted), I wasn’t sure if I should I use “e” and “a” to connect math and matics. I decided to go with an “e”, the symbol for energy, because in this existence (I guess) that, energy in formations of symbols called information is what defines the substance of life into and as the physical forms which we perceive and maybe exist as. Everything as the design of this existence is able to be defined, designed and created within and as words. In the beginning was the word, the word was... The word was placed as the tool with which to define, design and create within and as the substance of life. As for creation, it's simply a design or designs of and as life or life forms. Something to ponder or consider.
In the next paragraph, I basically went on to attempt to explain how words as symbols joined together are actually the tools by which we design and create ourselves and existence. For a while, I used to think to myself, why didn’t existence come with a user manual, surely we would have included it in the overall design. Lol, as it turns out the user manual was included in the original design in the beginning as the word. I guess we just didn’t notice it - as it was here ever before we as beings emerged. Have a listen to The Secret History of the Universe series (many times). A huge amount is covered in those recordings.
Finally, after getting that off of my chest, I pushed myself to relate something of my personal process. From my perspective of comparing the nowadays of the present with the days gone by, I would say that I am making progress, especially in terms of spending less time within and as energetic movements of my mind, which I guess may be indicative of an expanding awareness. Additionally, I no longer criticize or attack my mind for being so disciplined and diligent about asserting itself and even sometimes rebooting. Because after all is said and done, just as the design of the mind was apparently put in to prevent beings from gaining access to substance or the power of substance without understanding how to properly utilize it, so too perhaps was the design of consciousness placed into this existence long ago, before we even emerged, as a sort of a fail-safe plan to activate in the event that certain things didn’t go according to plan. The story that I have to tell about consciousness goes on and on. The short version of it is (I guess), either we as existence correct the situation here or the Consciousness of existence will handle it for us, which may be so much fun. Accordingly, although this existence may be by design; what’s not by design is how we determine to create ourselves as we journey within and as it.
Which brings me back once again to the point that I started out to write. Even though I’ve been addressing and changing myself from participating in energetic definitions of consciousness to standing and moving more as physical awareness for longer periods of time, the energies still do pop up every now and then when I least expect them, essentially when I’m not on guard. Thankfully, as I already related, I’m also getting better at stopping them or at least extracting myself from them more quickly, before so much damage has been done. The last time this occurred as I lay in bed imagining with pictures and sounds, I kept noticing the pain in my stomach growing bigger and bigger and I said to myself, I’ve gotta stop this, stop, stop, stop, enough is enough, I’ve dealt with this and I’m ending it right here. And I did just that. Nevertheless though, my mind continued to throw out suggestions or invitations here and there and sometimes even hook me for a moment, but only a moment, because, as I feel the pain and I do not enjoy it, I am also more than ever determined to stop and/or prevent it.
Of the of pain, I suggest that an awareness of physical pain is not something to shy away from, but to embrace and stand as equally as one is able so as to physically feel what the body’s going through and the damage that’s being done by the acceptance and allowance of such thought patterns. Specifically, pain can be very supportive in assisting one to locate the problem area and remain focused on solving it. Thus, I am starting to see more clearly how my body communicates and how we as body, being and mind are able to cooperate in this merging process. The Physical and I is a good place to learn more about the mind body relationship.
So, instead of viewing my mind as a hindrance, I’ve come to appreciate it as a tool or even a dedicated partner that I’m able to utilize in the process of self-creation. As I see it, the gift of our minds as well as each one’s consciousness (aside its failsafe protocol - lol) is the presentation of the mirror image of (1) who/how we are in terms of what we have accepted and allowed of ourselves as points of energic definition and (2) via the absence of such energetic definitions, the progresses we’re making in determining how we are creating ourselves to be and become.
Finally, finally, I would like to reiterate that, the instruction manual to existence has always been here right in front of us within and as the word. All we’ve gotta do is re-organize ourselves as living words by rewriting our sentences of self imposed diminishment to that of living words of potential expansion in order to move to re-substantiate ourselves as the substance of life based on equality, oneness and what is best. From this point, we are able to answer the question and fulfill our quest.