This is basically how I’ve been
making my way through the world system as far back as I remember,
stopping for a while, exploring, and then moving on. There are
considerations that I apply to where I work and live, such as the
cost of living, the currency rate, the environment, etc., yet on this
occasion it is for the most part a comparison of the
benefits/drawbacks of staying home in my current location, versus the
benefits/drawbacks of setting up somewhere else. Looking back at the
last year or so, I see that this is just about the way I planned it; in
a sense, right back where I started, yet this time with a different
point of view. My family – wife and dog appear to be healthy, and I
have regained the strength/use of my legs (ankles and knees), which
is interesting because my posture/walk is now better than it used to
be – a post for another day.
What will I do with my opportunity?
(*Every breath is actually an opportunity)
I’ll use it to continue
testing/investigating/walking my path, to see what changes I've
solidified and what remains of mind. As far as whether I’ll stay in
Taoyuan City or go somewhere else to live and work for a while
remains. for me to see, keeping my eyes open for something new. The
main point as I see it is to continue walking step-by-step, and not
get lost trying to go back to the way I was before; I’ve been down
that back-road before and I didn't enjoy it. So, tomorrow I’ll
drive down to central Taiwan to the area where I had lived and
worked at the Buddhist elementary school. I enjoy the environment
down there – mountains, rivers, trees, bicycle riding, hiking, etc.
It's the location I've been eyeing as a place to possibly resettle –
trade in the city life, for a house with a garden and trees in the
country. Last year I went there thinking that it would be simple to do just that. It didn't work out that way; my big plans
rarely do, because they really do require to be walked in space time, step by
step. Since that time, I've realized that I had created an idea based on
how I imagined my life should be, and in chasing that idea, I had
skipped some necessary steps required to actually get there. This
time around, I’m slowing myself down. After-all, I now realize that it
doesn't really matter what location I’m at, as long as I am
directing myself to be and remain here.
- I commit myself to stay on the course of change that I’ve established and within this, direct myself to move deeper into/as the physical, living here.
- I commit myself to expand me within and as the changes that I have begun to realize, and within this solidify these changes. Specifically, I commit myself to when deciding which direction to move, keep it practical and physical.
- I commit myself (within planning and deciding where I’ll be living and working) to keep my focus on what is practical and best for all those involved.
- I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react to the act of driving around in the city, looking for a parking space, eating out, and regretting that I didn't just insist that we stay home and eat.
- I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge “eating out for entertainment) to be a waste of money and rarely fun.
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