Careful what you wish for

 

There is a Chinese saying that I interpret like this: it is always better to settle all debts and make amends for wrong deeds before the end of the lunar year in order to begin the new year with a clean slate. 

Five days ago (just eight days before a new lunar year begins), I received news that my partner and I would finally be finished with an important case that we’ve been working on for 7- 8 years. Then I realized that it was more likely be another year or two before completed that. I had heard the acceptable news that sounded like a doable compromise to me. Then I heard the corrected, unacceptable version, I cursed the system as being completely broken and said to myself, the system just needs to come crashing down. Be careful what you wish for.

The next morning, while still feeling a sense of foreboding, I decided to go wash my car. At the first T-intersection, a scooter rider almost hit the front of my car. What the hell is that person wearing, camouflage, I thought to myself. At the next intersection, a different scooter rider sideswiped the front bumper of my car, the first time that’s ever happened to me in almost twenty-nine years of driving in Taiwan. 

Within seven minutes, an ambulance with two EMT’s had arrived on the scene, as well as two police officers a few minutes later. As I assisted where I was able and watched the scene unfold, I noted to myself with a sense of admiration and acknowledged admission, how very well the system of caring for people works in Taiwan for the betterment of all of the people. 

By the end of the day, everything had turned out OK. My Taiwanese partner arrived and basically dealt with everything. We ended up giving the person with a bruised shoulder a regular envelope with scooter repair money, a red envelope with inconvenience money, and the police decided that they didn’t need to file a report – as per the merging of an old tradition with a newly designed system that seems to be functioning in ways that are best for all. 

Thus it is that I have taken back my curse of the system and decided to step back to refocus my attention on correcting myself (as part of the system) for the rest of this year and the year to come. In other words, while I still recognize that the basic foundation of the current system needs to be completely re-tasked to focus on caring for all (by equally distributing the resources as well as the responsibility unto all), I also now see and acknowledge that some parts of the system (in some places) are already being re-tasked or replaced, meaning that not everything of the system needs to come crashing down. 

After all, as I am part of the system, any crashing of that system is also going to crash down on me. Existence has a way of occasionally reminding me of these points (with little wakeup nudges or kicks in the butt).  And although such reminders are often unpleasant, I am still very thankful for them. 

Last year around this time, near the end and the beginning of the lunar new year, when news of the Guanzhuang Bingdu or Coronavirus first came out, I knew that it was only the beginning of more explosive times to come. At first, I thought that it might be nice to work from home (as perhaps did many others). I was wrong — sitting in front of my computer doing digital paperwork all day long (pretending to be teaching) is hell.  

Now, here we are once again at the end and the beginning of another (lunar) new year. Time for round 2, round 3 and so on. What’s it going to be this time around, mutated viruses, war, famine, starvation or perhaps the return of Nibiru and fiery comments crashing down from the sky?

Either way, from here on in, I have decided to refocus and maintain my attention in-words on myself, who and how I am, rather than who or how I think humanity ought to be. And whenever I notice a problem in front of me, I commit to slow myself down, stop for a moment, look at the situation, look for risks and opportunities, and most importantly to look to see if there is a bridge that I have already created (in words that I have already redefined and/or a pathway that I have already established and committed to walk) that I’m able to use so as not to have to struggle through the swamp.